I have learned a lot throughout the last few years: loving my queer heart, embracing this slender body, healing abandonment trauma…

Yet over and over again, I come across days and times when confusion and pain surge high. The more I look into myself, the greater the abyss becomes. Reality is what it is, no point in arguing against it. So then,  how do you take care of an aching soul? I’ll write down a simple list (for my information, too!):

-> Welcome the low feelings. Pain confusion resentment and such are legitimate feelings, and it’s only when we attach a negative value meaning that they start hurting. Everything (pain included) comes to pass, not to stay – it shall be well.

-> Do different. Do something different, don’t jump back into the familiar. If your ways of coping with pain haven’t served well (escaping into food, procrastinating, isolating) in the past, why not try something different now?

-> Find one thing you love, that’s fun, cheap, easy to do and serves you well. I like exploring tiny islands in the middle of no where, on Google Maps 🙂

-> Pet a cat, or play with a dog, or sit in the grass and watch the clouds room around.

-> Brush your hair, cherish your body, paint your nails, do your brows, do something loving for your physical body.

-> Go on a date by yourself, take in the decor, savour the food, observe your thoughts, smile to the guy seated next table, go wild and order dessert!

> Think of your grandma, or someone else who really, truly loved you unconditionally.

-> Create, so write, sing, paint, dance, workout or somehow express yourself. Let the high energy feelings come up and see where that takes you.

-> Keep a Gratitude List:Dear God, I am so grateful for wearing such a comfortable, cute t-shirt today. I am so grateful for meeting sweet, loving people today. I am so grateful for receiving voice texts from my special boy. I am so grateful for my body and senses and kind heart.’ Change Dear God for Life, Creator, Universe… 🙂

Above all, be good to yourself, eat clean, go to bed early and stay open to love and the possibility of more happening for you!

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